You Oughta Know

Oh, to be 7 again.

             It’s difficult to pinpoint the time in a person’s life at which they lock into their own, individual taste in music. We all grow up with constant influences, the strongest of which come from parents, older siblings and what’s on television. In my earliest memorable years of education and, well, life, I can recall listening to Phish and Bob Marley in my dad’s car, eves dropping on my brothers quarrel over who gets to carry Blink-182’s Enema of the State that day and, with the rest of the world, watching Britney Spears shake it in her first music video.

            By the time I was entering 4^th grade, the only concert I had seen was the Blue Man Group. Dope, right? It was around the same time that I had inherited (stole) a very, very unattractive CD-player from someone else in my house. I didn’t have a logical reason to snatch it from its dormant place, seeing as I didn’t own any CD’s, but that changed quickly. After hiding my new, prized possession under my pillow, I made my way to my mother’s car, discreetly of course. I flipped through the few CD’s she had, unfazed by most, until I came across Alanis Morissette’s Jagged Little Pill. Being eight, or whatever, I safely assumed that said pill was a Flintstones' vitamin. I knew the album though, hearing it often in my mother’s car, and knew that I liked it.

Relatable.

           

                A 4^th grade boy listening to “You Oughta Know” on repeat, to and from school, may seem strange, but it also may provide an answer to why I am the way I am. An avid believer in nurture over nature, it only makes sense that I turned out the way I did. Whether or not I was born gay, my perception of men was heavily influenced by this song. I don’t trust them. I partially hate them. The disdain directed towards them, however, comes from jealousy and loneliness. I really have so much love for them. Time went on and Alanis was reduced from a “need to click repeat” artist to an “I used to love this song” artist, but the memory has stayed clear. There once was a time when I couldn’t decipher the meanings of these lyrics, or even recite them, but they spoke nothing but true to me and, as Alanis says, “I thought you should know.”

_GaDing